F*cking up my Life

I don't even know from where I should start.... 

So hey guys,  I m Nitya , 12th Science student,  studying my ass off for NEET..... Still I m lacking confidence and for that I m seriously pressuring myself while saying the same thing again and again that I m gonna work hard for NEET but still I wanna enjoy my period of it and My enjoyment is just series after solving 100 questions a day and that too when I m sick but here we goes again like every Indian parents, my parent's also have been sure that I m just using my phone and not studying thats why I m not getting their expected grades.... Actually I get that I m at fault here because No one made my confidence low except me myself and thinking about this stuffs is seriously making pressure on me and now I m seriously doing yoga and stuffs but still these stuffs don't wanna leave my mind.... 

But again all I do is keep smiling and let others think that I m a great daughter who keeps laughing and enjoying her life to the fullest and even my parent's believe that because I don't want them to think I m dramatic and going nuts... 

I made this page just to make sure that strangers can help me because for sure they don't have any expectations from me as we don't even know each other and I don't wanna destroy my close ones' hopes....